The Command to Love (Part 3)

1 Corinthians 13:4 - Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. (NIV)

Love is not boastful, braggadocios, nor proud! Have you ever met someone that just went on and on and on about what they have done, where they have been, who they have met, who they are about to have dinner with, the designer they wear, the car they drive, how much their shoes are, and the list goes on? Yes? I am sure we all have met at least one person like this. Usually the person is bragging, boasting and trying to impress; love does not do this. From the text above, we see that love does not boast and it is not proud. One thing common to boasting and pride is that they like to talk about themselves and are really not interested in anything or anyone else; it has to be about them, what they have done, what they have, and what they are going to do or get. The love of God is truly interested in others and is not focused on self. 

Obadiah 1:3 - The pride of thine heart hath deceived thee...

Pride deceives the prideful and tries to deceive others as well. One of the primary reasons people lie is because of pride. Why? Because, usually, they are ashamed of the truth, so they make things up to look better. Lie long enough about something and you will start to believe it i.e. the pride of thine heart hath deceived thee. One thing about humility is that it lives in reality and it is not deceived nor does it try deceiving anyone. Lying is of the devil; his very language is lie. 

John 8:44 - You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father's desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.

So when God’s children lie, they switch over to the realm of darkness; there is no darkness in God (love) at all. This is sometimes why the enemy has a hold on the children of God; they are identifying with the devil rather than with God. The devil is the father of liars or deceivers; there are no white lies, lies are lies. However, he that walks in love walks in God; the father of those that walk in love is God – there is no lie or deception in God.

It can be described like this, let's say God is pure water, when we walk in love, we become pure water and completely miscible with him, so when one looks at us, they see God because pure water mixed with pure water is pure water. When we do not walk in love, we are like spent engine oil that cannot mix with water; if you try to mix water and oil, you get two different layers which can be easily separated. In the state of the spent oil, not only can we be easily scooped up, the enemy can easily plague us because we are not operating in our dominion when we walk in his realm.

James 4:6 - But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble.  

The very thought of God resisting me in anyway is unbearable, so for me learning more about what pride is became very important to me; that way, I can avoid pride, be humble and enjoy the grace of God. In reading the scriptures, and listening to some messages on humility, I have come to learn some of the characteristics of pride. As discussed earlier in this series on love, pride does not honor people enough to listen to what others have to say; pride interrupts people and is not a listener (see The command of love Part 2). Pride exaggerates things to look good or better than they really are. Pride knows exactly how everyone should treat or address it; proud people would often think to themselves, don’t they know who I am? They should talk to me like this, give me this, and exempt me from this or that… Pride thinks it needs to be treated differently or preferentially than anyone else because pride is puffed up.  

Proverbs 13:10 - Only by pride comes strife: but with the well advised is wisdom.

Where there is strife, there is pride! This scripture reveals that the source of strife is pride. So when someone is always in strife with almost everyone, the person needs to check him or herself for pride. In marriages, a home filled with strife has one or both spouses walking in pride; when both members of a marriage walk in love towards each other, strife is forced out of that home.  Pride also finds it hard to admit it does not know something. How many times have many of us got lost going somewhere because we refuse to ask for directions? How many times have you seen someone trying to do something for the first time and refuse help from an expert because they do not want to admit they don’t know? People have actually broken expensive electronics because of this. Everyone already knows that nobody knows everything, so it is OK to admit that there are things we do not know. Pride tries to paint a picture that it knows everything about everything; sometimes, it is humorous to watch such people talk about a subject they pretend to be experts about and in actuality know very little to nothing about the subject matter. Pride is not teachable; a student that thinks he already knows will find it difficult to learn - the pride of their hearts has deceived them to believe they are experts when they are not. Pride is very ugly and is the very thing that got the devil kicked out of heaven.

When Pride is wrong, it would rather act nice to you than say it is sorry; pride finds it hard to say sorry. I am sure we have all met people like this; humility, which is the nature of love, is quick to repent and ask for forgiveness. Pride in most cases would not even admit that it is wrong, it would rather defend it’s stand no matter how obviously erroneous and faulty such a defense may be; in other words, pride is very defensive and finds it difficult to apologize for a wrong. Lastly, for this post, pride refuses to show how impressed it is of the achievement of others; pride would actually down play such achievements. At times, pride would actually find something it has done in the past that is better than the current achievement of another being discussed. You would hear pride say things such as “oh, that is a nice car, but my first car actually had X, which this one does not have” or “oh he came first out of 40 people that took the exam? Well, when I did mine, there were 45 people that took the exam and I came first”. Pride can’t imagine anyone doing better than it, so it does not show impression, nor allow itself to be impressed by the achievement of others.

Many think pride is limited to the rich, Nah! Anyone can be proud: the rich, the poor, and everyone in-between… it is a state of the heart, not a state of the pocket.

The next post will look into other characteristics of the love of God.